Do or Think: What I Will Accomplish in 2011

December 28 – Achieve. What’s the thing you most want to achieve next year? How do you imagine you’ll feel when you get it? Free? Happy? Complete? Blissful? Write that feeling down. Then, brainstorm 10 things you can do, or 10 new thoughts you can think, in order to experience that feeling today.

I've been on a bit of a running kick the past few months but lately, I've been struggling a bit with wanting to go and struggling to get past the 3 mile mark. Right now, the thing I want to achieve MOST next year is running the Winter Park 10K at the end of March. I know to some, 6.2 miles may not seem like a lot but considering 5K's were a huge deal before, I'm excited that I'm even attempted to take the next step up.

There is something about seeing the finish line when running this events. It doesn't matter how much you walked or struggled to get to that point, when you see all those faces lined up on the side, people clapping for you that you don't even know, it's a rush. It's a pure moment of complete accomplishment & happiness. I'm sure I'll also feel like I want to vomit but that's besides the point.

10 things I can do or think to accomplish this?

1. Do: Continue training & pushing myself to go further
2. Do: Find other locations to run besides the gym. I think I'm officially burnt out of running in place.
3. Do: Eat healthy. I'm not gonna go anywhere if I don't put good things in my body.
   
4. Do: Continue strength training. I can't lose site of making my muscles stronger because in the end, I need that to help me be a successful runner.
   
5. Do: Take care of my body. Re: Sleep, stretch, relax
6. Think: Positively. Sometimes I feel like mental thoughts outweigh the actual physical part of running. Gotta stay in a positive mental attitude.
7. Think: I can do it. If I don't believe in myself, why should anyone else?
   
8. Think: Don't kill yourself. Sometimes I get so caught up when I put my mind to something but I have to listen to my body and rest when it tells me to rest. I would like to achieve this, not kill myself in the process.
9. Think: All great things are accomplished by hard work. I can't expect to just run the 6.2 miles without working hard at it. Need to remind myself that all good things come alongside hard work.
10. Think: I am a runner. Sometimes, I don't think I'm a runner because I don't run half marathons and marathons but you know what? I run 3-4 times a week. That makes me a runner. I need to believe that.
    

Looking forward to March & looking forward to achieving this little dream of mine.

Ordinary Moments

December 27 – Ordinary Joy Our most profound joy is often experienced during ordinary moments. What was one of your most joyful ordinary moments this year?

Just so you know, I know I skipped a day. The 26th was asking about what food touched your soul. I love food, but no food touches me that deeply so I moved on. :)

When I think about this prompt, one moment specifically comes to mind. I had trucked up to Gainesville - for what I'm not really sure - but nonetheless, I was visiting my Mom & Dad. We had gone to Publix to pick up dinner and whatever else we could find for the evening. Anything from sangria to cheese to chips. We finally got back to the house, prepared the sangria and a couple trays of food, and headed downstairs to our family room to kick back and watch the Magic game.

Now, my Mom is not really one to say, "hey I really want to watch that ____ (pick any sporting event) today!" but she will definitely try her best to stay "in the know" about your teams and she'll most certainly watch with you. (I love that about her.) Anyway, I was sitting in one recliner, my Mom in the other, and my Dad was laying down on the couch and it just kind of realized that I live for those small moments of doing, well...nothing.

Remember when you were a kid and you were totally embarrassed to be even associated with your parents? Well, maybe you weren't but I kind of always was. (Sorry, Mom & Dad.) It wasn't "cool" to stay home and chill with your parents but strangely enough, as I get older, I crave that time with my parents. I want to just sit on the couch with them and tell stories about our day, help out in the kitchen or with little chores, or just snuggle up with my Mom and let her rub my hair. Those are the moments I think I will always remember. Those are the moments when I'm proud of who I call Mom and Dad because not only do I think they are pretty awesome but I know that I'm lucky to have them at all.

Pose for the Camera

December 25th: Sift through all the photos of you from the past year. Choose one that best captures you; either who you are, or who you strive to be. Find the shot of you that is worth a thousand words. Share the image, who shot it, where, and what it best reveals about you.
When we were in San Francisco, all I wanted to do was rent bikes and sing "In the Summertime" by Jerry Mungo. So, we did. We got bikes down at Fisherman's Wharf and biked all the way to the Golden Gate Bridge, over the bridge, and down to Sausalito. This picture was taken by a complete stranger on the very first take. We couldn't believe it ourselves. Absolute perfection!

I think this image reveals a few different things about me. I think it shows being fun & adventurous, as well someone who follows their dreams. If you read in my post about traveling, I've wanted to go to California my entire life and I finally made it happen.

It's not just about who I am currently, but it will be a constant reminder to never let my dreams go, be more adventurous, and do absolutely everything I can to live my life & not hold back.

Everything's Gonna Be Alright

December 24 Prompt – Everything’s OK. What was the best moment that could serve as proof that everything is going to be alright? And how will you incorporate that discovery into the year ahead?

Not to beat a dead horse, but honestly the best moment of 2010 that showed me everything is going to be alright was when I got my new job. There were plenty of times that I questioned why things weren't happening right when I wanted to. It feels like the right moment to me at that specific time, but I realize now that there are so many other pieces that have to fall into place before the silver lining comes to show its face.

I think the best way to incorporate this discovery in the year ahead is to try to remind myself when things are tough, that the universe is out there, moving things around & working its magic to make things "alright." And even though it might not happen when I specifically want it to happen, doesn't mean that it won't happen. It just means that there are other things in the works.

New Name? No Thanks.

December 23rd: New name. Let's meet again, for the first time. If you could introduce yourself to strangers by another name for just one day, what would it be and why?

If you asked me this question when I was younger, I probably would of had an answer. I HATED my name when I was younger. It was too long - to write & to say. But today? I absolutely love my name. It's been in my family for years & I'm proud to have it.

On the Road Again...

December 22 – Travel. How did you travel in 2010? How and/or where would you like to travel next year? (Author: Tara Hunt) {Future Tool: New Year’s Goal Questions for No-Goals Creatives from Jeffrey Davis. For the next 10 days as you round out your year, we’ll share one tool each day to help you [...]

In 2009, I promised myself I would travel more in 2010. I had the travel bug & I didn't want to stop at anything to venture to new places.

All my life I have wanted to go to California. It just so happened that DrupalCon was in San Francisco this past year, so I saved up, grabbed a few friends, and we headed there for a week. I can't remember ever going on a week vacation, anywhere. Even when I was younger and traveled with my family, it was never for a solid week.

The moment I stepped on the streets of San Francisco, I fell in love. I don't know if you've ever experienced a moment quite like this but I didn't need to go anywhere else, see any destinations, experience the city, I just knew. I just knew that someday, somehow I would live in San Francisco and it is most certainly on my radar now.

In 2010, I also got to visit Austin, TX for a conference at work. I was a little bummed because it was rainy and cold the entire time we were there and there wasn't much time for play with the conference and all. I also got to visit Virginia. I've been to Virginia a few times before but this time was extra special. My best friend got married and it was a beautiful, beautiful time in Virginia when we went.

In 2011, I am going to be going on a cruise with some of my best girlfriends. To where I'm not sure yet, but we know we're definitely going. I am also hoping to visit Arizona to see the Grand Canyon & family, as well as visit North Carolina. I look forward to visiting new places in 2011 & more importantly to creating new memories.

Dear Future Self, RELAX!

December 21 – Future Self. Imagine yourself five years from now. What advice would you give your current self for the year ahead? (Bonus: Write a note to yourself 10 years ago. What would you tell your younger self?) (Author: Jenny Blake)

I will sit here until I am blue in the face telling everyone and their mother that "things work out how they are supposed to - so there is no sense in worrying so much." Unfortunately, I'm quite the hypocrite about it. Because I (too often) sweat the small stuff, stress myself out, and drive myself absolutely crazy worrying so much.

So, I think the best thing I could possibly tell the future me (and the current me) is to friggin' RELAX.

Every little thing is going to work out how it should in the end. Everything. And I need to learn to enjoy life's moments more with much less worry.

No Regrets

December 20 – Beyond Avoidance. What should you have done this year but didn’t because you were too scared, worried, unsure, busy or otherwise deterred from doing? (Bonus: Will you do it?) (Author: Jake Nickell)

Honestly? I have zero regrets about 2010. This has been an absolutely amazing year for me and I am proud and happy to have experienced every little and big thing that happened.

I helped launch LadyBallers, a social network for men & women alike, I landed my dream job, I got back in shape, I traveled, I strengthened relationships, I became more involved in my community, and tons of other things

Of course, I had some fears and worries about my path and where it was leading me and there were definitely some hard moments, but I definitely don’t have any regrets. I had extremely high hopes for 2010 and I am extremely happy with the outcome.

With hard work comes many rewards.

Surprisingly, Reverb10 Is Healing Me

December 19 – Healing. What healed you this year? Was it sudden, or a drip-by-drip evolution? How would you like to be healed in 2011? (Author: Leonie Allan)

When I read this post, I had nothing. Seriously. Blank, blank, blank! You see, when I think about the word “healed,” I feel like I should have been heartbroken or something. So, for the past couple days, I have been trying to think outside the box about “healing” and what it actually means. And today, it finally hit me. Reverb10 IS healing me right this very minute.

In one of the earlier prompts, I wrote about eliminating the fear of writing. Fear of what other people think and the fear of digging deeper into my emotions and just putting it all out there. I have been actively avoiding writing and not just on my personal blog. I’ve been avoiding writing on other blogs that I contribute to as well and I honestly didn’t even realize it until now.

When I first decided to participate in Reverb10, I thought of it as more of a neat way to reflect on an amazing 2010 and less of a “task.” Not only have I been able to reflect, but I've noticed I am more free with what I write and less hesitant to say what I truly feel. Healing is a process and I don't think I'm 100% there, but I'm definitely on my way.

December 18th: Try

December 18 – Try. What do you want to try next year? Is there something you wanted to try in 2010? What happened when you did / didn’t go for it? (Author: Kaileen Elise)

The biggest thing I want to try for 2011 is to focus on my graphic designing and development skills. I've been taking some time off of extra-curricular activities and trying to just enjoy myself. I have been doing a lot of relaxing, hanging out with friends, working out, etc...but I think it's time to get back into the swing of things.

I don't want to lose sight of my goals and there is no time like the present!

I am Capable

December 17 – Lesson Learned What was the best thing you learned about yourself this past year? And how will you apply that lesson going forward? (Author: Tara Weaver)

This has kind of been a tough prompt for me. After a lot of thought, I think the best thing I learned this year is that I am capable. Sometimes I allow the word "can't" to creep into my head more often than I would like to actually admit. From graphic designing challenges at work to even running on the treadmill, I somehow let the "I can't" take over my brain and give up instead of pushing myself to overcome the mental block.

It's definitely something I have been working on all year, and I do have my moments of weakness, but for the most part I have really learned that I truly am capable of doing anything that I set my mind to as long as I believe in myself.

That last part of my lesson that I mentioned, the "as long as I believe in myself," part really is the key to knowing that I am capable and the key to continue overcoming any future "can't" battles. If I don't believe in myself, why should anyone else? I am smart, strong, & resilient but I have to believe that first and those three words, "I am capable," is a great way to remind myself. =)

Making Rifts in My World

December 16 – Friendship. How has a friend changed you or your perspective on the world this year? Was this change gradual, or a sudden burst? (Author: Martha Mihalick)

I think it's really easy to get caught up in the moment sometimes. So easy that you don't always see you're being treated unfairly or badly. You get sucked up in this little whirlwind or you find an easy way to justify the situation or the way someone treated you.

With that being said, I don't think any one friend has changed my perspective on the world as a whole per se, but has changed the perspective on my world. This friend (let's call her Julia) and I share a mutual friend (say Maggie) that we both love and care for very much. However, sometimes Maggie can do things and say things that I often find myself justifying in my head...

She said ____ because she's going through a rough time & is really stressed.
She canceled on me because she hasn't see _____ in a few days.

Etc...etc...

When I see Maggie treat Julia this way, I get upset that Julia never says anything...never stands up for herself. She just lets Maggie do whatever she wants. It wasn't until the later half of the year that I realized she does the same thing to me, and I react the same way Julia does. It's helped me step out of those moments I get so easily caught up in and it changes my perspective about Maggie & helps me realize that it's not acceptable to treat people that way.

I Want to Take...

December 15 – 5 Minutes. Imagine you will completely lose your memory of 2010 in five minutes. Set an alarm for five minutes and capture the things you most want to remember about 2010. (Author: Patti Digh)

Is it possible to take all the happy moments of 2010? If so, that's what I want to take from 2010.

I want to take all the playtime with my little munchkins.
I want to take all the popcorn nights with my roomie and best friend.
I want to take all the nights dancing like a crazy person at Eye Spy.
I want to take all the ridiculously large dinners with my family.
I want to take all the hugs of love and hope.
I want to take all the game day festivities (not necessarily all the loses ha).
I want to take all the gchats of cute emoticons with good friends.
I want to take all the special one on one time and conversations with my Mom and Dad.

I want to take all the laughter, smiles, love, hugs, & hopes with me from 2010.

Appreciate the Small Things

December 14 – Appreciate. What’s the one thing you have come to appreciate most in the past year? How do you express gratitude for it? (Author: Victoria Klein)

I think the greatest thing I have come to appreciate the most is my friends. When I was in high school, I remember my sister would always tell me that when I get older, I would only have enough "good" friends to count on one hand. I always told her she was lying - I was absolutely certain I would have multitudes of "good" friends...ha!

But as time passes and as people change and grow, I realize how blessed I really am. There is an amazing amount of comfort and appreciation in knowing that I have fantastic friends I can always turn to. It doesn't matter how many or how few - it's really just about the quality (and I'll take quality over quantity any day).

A few weeks ago, a good friend of mine was in a terrible car accident and after looking at the pictures, I'm not really sure how she could have possibly survived. It's times like that, and moments like this where I realize how much I appreciate who I have in my life. The best way I know how to express gratitude for it is by trying to be as good of a friend to them as they have been to me. And most importantly, always telling them how much I care & love them.

"Enjoy the little things in life, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things." ~Author Unknown

It's Not Always About the Big Goals

December 13 – Action When it comes to aspirations, it’s not about ideas. It’s about making ideas happen. What’s your next step? (Author: Scott Belsky)

The past year was definitely about making BIG steps towards my goals. I was on a fast-paced train and I was doing whatever I needed to do to get to where I wanted to be. However, I feel as though my 2011 is going to be quite different from my 2010 whirlwind. It's going to be full of reaching small goals & taking baby steps towards achieving my bigger goals for the future.

So, for the time being, my focuses of 2011 are to:

• Improve my design & development skills (especially CSS).
• Continue to better my running.
  
• Cultivate & grow friendships.
• Save money.
• Increase my involvement with communities I've already been established with and help them grow.
• Continue spreading positivity.

It might be a small list but there's always room for more. =)

Running = Connected

December 12 – Body Integration This year, when did you feel the most integrated with your body? Did you have a moment where there wasn’t mind and body, but simply a cohesive YOU, alive and present? (Author: Patrick Reynolds)

A couple months ago, when I realized my dieting and exercising hit a plateau, I decided I needed to take it up a notch. I bought one of the Jillian Michaels' videos and I wanted to take my running a bit more serious. You see, I have been running for years but have never really considered myself a true runner. I would run to primarily to get rid of stress and to burn calories but would never push myself to go beyond the 2 or 3 mile mark or push myself to actually improve.

I decided it was time to try endurance training - I had heard many times that it was a great way (if not the only way) to improve in running. So, I started and it was rough to say the least. I was only running at about 5.6 on a treadmill and probably only going a total of 2.5 miles (if even). But I continued to stick to it with the help of my awesome running mentor and I have definitely seen improvements but it wasn't until last week when I realized I felt the most connected to my body when I run.

I find a sign or a landmark to focus all my attention on, I put on my running playlist, and I truly just zone out. All the day's events become completely irrelevant and my mind just goes quiet. I focus solely on my breathing and on the sign/landmark I have chosen for the night, and I just run. On this particular day, I hit 5 miles - something I've actually never done. And the only words that come to mind when I think about this glorious moment are: strong, proud, and connected.

11 Things I Don't Need in 2011

December 11 – What are 11 things your life doesn’t need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life? (Author: Sam Davidson)

I read a book earlier this year called, "Happy," by Ian K. Smith. A large portion of the book focuses on being optimistic as well as putting yourself first, showing gratitude, pursuing your dreams, simplifying your life, and ultimately being happy. At one point in the book, Smith says,"Too many dark clouds can block the most beautiful sunset. Less is often more, and simplifying your life isn't as difficult or as painful as you might think."

Life is full of things I "don't need" and 2011 is fine time to simplify my life in every way I can. Here are my 11 things I don't need in 2011:

1. More friends. I know that probably sounds pretty bitchy but I truly made a lot of connections in 2010 and now I really want to focus on making those relationships better before I start building more.
   
2. Bad health. As much as I love food, I really don't want to be the size of a cow. I have to continue to make working out and eating right a priority. And that doesn't include giving up cupcakes and ice cream either. Moderation, people! Moderation.
3. Negativity. I am pretty certain nobody needs this in their life and I know that I certainly don't either. Life is too short to be anything but happy. But it's also too short to get caught up in the "woe is me." In 2011, I will continue to find the good in every situation, regardless.
4. Structure. Ok, that's some what of a lie. My life definitely needs structure as in organization but I also know that I need more adventure in my life. I need to start living in the moment more.
5. Crazymakers. I read "The Artist's Way" by Julia Cameron earlier this year. She talks about getting rid of the crazymakers in your life. "Crazymakers are those personalities that create storm centers. They are often charismatic, frequently charming, highly inventive, and powerfully persuasive...Crazymakers like drama. If they can swing it, they are the star. Everyone around them functions as a supporting cast, picking up their cues, their entrances and exits, from the crazymaker's whims." Enough said.
6. Irresponsible finances. I like to shop. I can't even lie about it. I have the, "work hard, play hard" mentality but I definitely think I've reached a point where I need to be a bit more responsible about my finances. I need to pay my credit cards off and save. There's too many things I want to do in life and last time I checked, nothing's free.
7. Guilt. I'm sick of feeling like I "have" to do things - go to events, social gatherings, etc. I have no desire to continue doing things I don't want to do and I'm not going to feel guilty or obligated anymore.
8. Perfection. I think I constantly push myself because I don't ever think what I am doing is good enough. For who? I don't know. But I do know that I need to come to terms with this, sooner than later. Who I am and what I am doing with my life is good enough.
9. Excuses. I am responsible for myself and for my actions and I need to own up to it. No more excuses - it is what it is.
   
10. Worry. It's useless. I believe there is a greater plan and there is truly no sense is worrying about stuff. Things will work out how they should - it's up to me to see the good in how it does actually work out.
    
11. What if's. They can seriously go to hell. There is what happened and there is what didn't happen and there should not be imaginary scenarios and what if's running through my head. They are just false hopes. I need to be realistic.

My "Slap You in Your Face" Wise Decision

December 10 – Wisdom Wisdom. What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how did it play out? (Author: Susannah Conway)

I'm the kind of girl who likes to stay busy. I get bored pretty easily so I fill my plate up with projects and social gatherings and leave little time to relax beyond the 6-7 hours of sleep (if I'm lucky) I get at night.

Back in June, I had a bit of a breakdown. I had gone and made my life so incredibly busy that I found I had absolutely no time to breathe and my stress levels were through the roof. I never slept, I put my health on the back burner, I put everyone else's needs in front of my own, and I was quite simply a mess. I felt myself growing distant - not physically distant but emotionally distant. I was present in body but not usually in spirit. I grew quite good at putting on a show and although others perceived me as being "happy," I was really just crying out of for help on the inside.

So, for me, the wisest decision I made this year was to slow down.

When I burst out in somewhat of an uncontrollable sob while sharing dessert with my sister, it hit me that I just couldn't live this way anymore. It didn't matter that I wanted so desperately to advance my career, grow my network, support my friends in their endeavors, or anything of that sort. In fact, for once, the only thing that mattered at that moment was me - a far stretch from what I had been putting as priority in my life.

So, I removed myself from the chaos of my own life and promised myself I would put me first regardless of what was happening around me. I started eating healthier, I got back to the gym, I took the majority of the week to just relax on my couch, I slept, and little by little, I was put back together - I was finally strong again - mind, body, and spirit.

"Slow down and enjoy life. It's not only the scenery you miss by going to fast - you also miss the sense of where you are going and why." ~Eddie Cantor

Social Gatherings that Make My Heart Smile

December 9 – Party Prompt: Party. What social gathering rocked your socks off in 2010? Describe the people, music, food, drink, clothes, shenanigans. (Author: Shauna Reid)

When I think of social gatherings where I've had more fun then I could possibly imagine, three ladies always come to my mind - Michelle, Shanick, and Melissa. I am truly blessed in the friend area of my life but these ladies make my heart smile. It doesn't matter what is happening, how busy life is, or when the last time we saw each other was, we always make time for each other.

I remember this one night in particular that occurred early this year. It was a normal, "we need a night out! Let's go dancing!" night when we all met up. We were in downtown Orlando at Latitudes - a pretty popular rooftop bar. I remember the weather was perfect. It wasn't too hot but definitely not cold and the night had the most perfect breeze about it. The four of us met up with some other friends who had been on a pub crawl that had started earlier that night. We were dancing and having a great time when Melissa ran into a guy that she knew from high school. We all started chit-chatting - I was getting to know one of the guys with him and they were catching up on this blast from the past.

We were definitely having a good time but in a blink of an eye, it was packed and uncomfortable and we were kind of over it. The guys told us they were heading to The Other Bar and we decided to join them. =) The rest of the night was fun of talking, dancing, and laughing the night away. I swear, every single time I get to hang out with these ladies, we have he absolute BEST time together and when I think of moments in 2010 that truly make my heart smile, I always see their faces.

Embracing My "Weirdness"

December 8 – Beautifully Different. Think about what makes you different and what you do that lights people up. Reflect on all the things that make you different – you’ll find they’re what make you beautiful. (Author: Karen Walrond)

I have heard, "you're so weird" way too many times in my life - more so as I get older. My instinctive response is always, "I know." But the thing is, I don't actually know what I do that makes people think I am so weird/unique/different because I'm simply just being me.

I am incredibly shy but can usually mask it enough to where people don't really notice.
I prefer strawberry jam with my peanut butter.
I always give people the benefit of the doubt even if they don't deserve it.
I make people laugh more when I'm not even trying.
I ask the most ridiculous random questions (and usually at really inappropriate times).
I hate being asked personal questions, but at any given moment, I'm a complete open book.
I'm am obsessed with birds. I truly believe they are the connectors between heaven & earth.
I love giraffes and I want to be one for Halloween next year.
I have reading A.D.D. - I hardly ever finish a book.
I like to sing my sentences or just random words.
I would eat dessert over dinner any day.

If all those things are considered to be "different," then so be it. I think they are beautiful and I will forever embrace it.

Helping Build a Strong Community

December 7 – Community Prompt: Community. Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010? What community would you like to join, create or more deeply connect with in 2011? (Author: Cali Harris)

Community played a HUGE role for me in 2010. I realized early on that the only way to grow your network was to become involved online and offline. I established a strong community on Twitter with local people but mainly with people in other states. I have met some really amazing people who have helped me grow throughout the year - whether it was discussing design, development, writing, or even just sports talk, I found people to connect with, learn from, and help.

Although online communities are truly fantastic, I was really able to build my local community here in Orlando too. I'm involved with a few organizations (Florida Drupal, Florida Creatives, LadyBallers, Relay for Life Downtown Orlando, and Yelp) and I have been absolutely amazed by the connections I've gained over this year. I am truly surrounded by wonderful, smart, and talented people. So, it is definitely important for me to stay involved locally and for 2011 and I really want to grow with these communities further. I want to continue to be involved and establish stronger relationships with those I've already met but also spread the word about these great locals.

"Since you get more joy out of giving joy to others, you should put a good deal of thought into the happiness that you are able to give." ~Eleanor Roosevelt

Getting Creative and Crafty!

December 6 – Make. What was the last thing you made? What materials did you use? Is there something you want to make, but you need to clear some time for it? (Author: Gretchen Rubin)

I pride myself on being one crafty chick. I’ve been a crafty kid all my life. From making jewelry to painting, to collages, to even making t-shirts. You name it and I’ve probably done it.

In case you didn’t know, I am a super lover of sushi. I am also a super lover of Halloween. I absolutely adore dressing up and getting all creative with costumes. This past Halloween, I decided to take my love for sushi one step up and BE sushi for Halloween. =) Unless I wanted to spend $60+ on my costume, I knew I was going to have to MAKE it – which I think is more fun anyway.

I sewed a small pillow using red/orange-ish fabric (salmon is my favorite!), athletic tape to create the lines on the pillow, dark green ribbon for the seaweed, & chopsticks in my hair. I also made a soy sauce purse. I bought a black canvas bag then ironed on letters to spell out Kikkoman Soy Sauce.

Although not everyone “got it” right away, I absolutely loved it. I also convinced my sister to buy her newborn a pea costume so he could be my edamame. =)

Now, ask me to cook? No way. =)

Letting Go Doesn't Mean Giving Up

December 5 – Let Go. What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why? (Author: Alice Bradley)

All my life, I have struggled to let go. To me, letting go of someone or something lies solely in understanding. And when I don't understand, I ask questions. I take that little word, "why," and I twist and turn and beat the living hell out of it, hoping for clarity. Asking questions allows me to come up with a reason of why something is (or isn't) happening. It allows me to take my unconditional hope, put a spin on the situation for the better, and hold on.

I'm happy to say that I've come to realization that letting go of someone or something should not be the result of days, weeks, & months of asking questions and pouring hope into a situation I cannot control. Yet, letting go should be the realization that I’ve done everything within my power to make this situation the absolute best that it can be and there is nothing left I can give to it to make it better.

Most recently, I let go of someone that I have been holding onto for a long time. I had always thought this person and I were meant to have a chance together but the timing just never seemed right. We went through so much together, and I held on for so long, clinging to the hope that our "someday" was right around the corner. Then it hit me that the timing never being right was a sign in and of itself. I had made myself available enough times to try and make it work but I just didn't have anymore to give. I didn't have any more time to spend waiting for someone who simply wasn't making the time for us.

So, I let him go and I haven't looked back since.

Stepping into the "New" Creates Wonder

My roommate and I just finished decorating our house for Christmas. It's our 2nd Christmas living together and I have to say that this year feels more like home. Everything has a place to go in the house and it feels like we now have a bit of a tradition.

I absolutely love traditions. Knowing that I always have something or someone to fall back on simply makes my heart smile. And quite frankly, it might just be my favorite part about holidays. Of course I love a gift or two =) but the comfort of tradition trumps any sort of gift in my book.

This cozy feeling of the holidays surrounding me in full-force today helps me to easily paint the picture of my answer to today's #reverb10 topic:

December 4th: Wonder. How did you cultivate a sense of wonder in your life this year?

For me, cultivating a sense of wonder in my life is about creating experiences that are new, uncomfortable, and surprising. Earlier this year, I read the book, The Artist's Way. The book focuses on helping you find a deeper meaning and connection with your creative journey. I was first intrigued by this book after I became a full time graphic designer and I realized how quickly my creative juices could dwindle down. I really enjoyed this book because it helped shine a new light to my creativity. I was asked to answer questions that once had never crossed my mind (and that were quite difficult to be honest). I was also asked to take myself on a date every week to a new place and to breathe in new things, feelings, surrounds, etc.

At first, I kinda thought the whole concept was silly - take myself on a date? But once I realized that I've had plenty of "me" time in the past and after the first couple of dates occured, I realized that this was the perfect way to continue to create wonder in my life - To go to places I had never been to instead of the same old same old, to try new recipes/desserts, to try a new kind of exercise (Jillian Michaels is kicking my butt this month!), etc... I realize those are ways that I create wonder in my everyday life and I hope to continue to create this sense of wonder as I head into 2011.

Tears of Joy Stream Down My Face

December 3 – Moment. Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail (texture, smells, voices, noises, colors).

There has definitely been some incredible moments that happened this year but I have to say that out of all of those moments, there is only one true moment where I felt most alive: The day I was offered a new job.

I had been patiently waiting for an email offering me the position of graphic designer for a new and upcoming company. It was actually one of the first emails I got that day. I remember when I saw the email, I was so beyond nervous to open it. My future was being held captive inside this tiny email and I, Elizabeth Farmer, was actually scared to open it. I remember sending a text message to my my good friend telling him I got the offer letter but that I didn't want to open it. His loving reply? "Don't be ridiculous - just open it." Ha. I truly felt like a little kid on Christmas praying I was opening a present I had so desperately been wanting all year. After opening the email, I realized the present I had been waiting for had finally arrived and it was exactly what I wanted.

I immediately went outside and called my sister. The second she answered the phone, I started to tell her that I got the job when all of a sudden, tears of joy were streaming down my face. Never in my life have I cried tears of joy but as I stood there on the phone with my sister, I felt the release of all that stress and sadness of being caught up in a job that was slowly killing me simply disappear. In the blink of an eye, I realized all my hard work was finally paying off and I was being given a chance of a lifetime.

Makes me smile just thinking about it.

Eliminating the Fear

The blog that I poured my heart and soul into is on a bit of a hiatus as of now. I used to blog pretty regularly. It first started out as a way to just get things off my mind, to clear my head, but as I progressed through my year of growth it quickly became a way to keep my positive mentality alive - a way to take a story, see the lesson inside it, and share it with others. I was on my journey, sharing my life with others, and hopefully bringing some insight to their own. But once I had reached my "big destination" for the year (my new fabulous job), I noticed that the quality of my posts began to decrease. I was blogging just to blog. I wasn't angry anymore, I wasn't in unhappy relationships anymore (for the most part), and I wasn't leading a life of negativity anymore. In fact... I was BEAMING from head-to-toe, but I simply felt like I had nothing to write about anymore.

There was also this thing called: I felt like I had to filter myself for I KNEW who was reading my blog posts. I wanted to dig deeper in my journey, but I was feeling like I had to watch what I said and filter myself. (Ugh...that makes me disappointed in myself.) BUT I kept at it, I tried to block those thoughts, hoping that I was just in a "phase." But empty post after empty post led me to feel like blogging was pointless.

In a last effort, I wrote a post about love. I was going through some stuff in my personal life and I wanted to write about it. It started strong but in the end, it turned out to be short and somewhat "unfinished." And by unfinished, I mean I didn't allow myself to really lay it all out there because I couldn't get past the fear of what others were going to think. After much hesitation, I hit publish anyway. And boy oh boy did that not work so well for me. Shortly after I whore'd out the link (Twitter, Facebook, blah blah), I got a text - a disapproving text - of what I wrote. And you know what I did? I unpublished it without hesitation.

The next day, I closed the chapter on my blog for a while. I couldn't get past these ridiculous mental barriers and I had had enough. I wasn't getting anything out of my own blog anymore and I realized I wasn't blogging FOR me. So, I said farewell (for now) and I honestly haven't thought much about it until I got today's Reverb10 topic:

December 2 Writing.
What do you do each day that doesn’t contribute to your writing — and can you eliminate it?

After reading this, I realized I haven't done much writing, if any at all. This blog... this "Keep Moving Forward" project is the first time I've written since I said goodbye to The Unconventional Geek over a month ago. I have to say, it feels good to write again.

At this point, I do a lot of things that don't contribute to my writing - getting caught up on my DVR, Facebook/Twitter, gym time, hanging out with friends, etc...but it hasn't really mattered because I haven't been writing in general. Of course I can eliminate these things or at least decrease the amount of time spent on them but what I need to eliminate first is allowing the fear of what other people think about my writing get in the way of actually writing.

A Year of Growth

I was catching up on one of my favorite bloggers when I saw something about #reverb10. It looks like reverb10 is a little project where you take the time to reflect on this year & manifest what's next. Interesting, right? So, naturally I wanted to partake in this little project. It officially started yesterday, so I'm a day late - better late than never, right? Here goes:

December 1 One Word.
Encapsulate the year 2010 in one word. Explain why you’re choosing that word. Now, imagine it’s one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2011 for you?

My word for 2010: GROWTH

I have to say that 2010 has been a pretty amazing year for me. I started the year in a ... well I wouldn't say, "bad place," but not in the place I wanted to be. I was fighting a battle with negativity, unhealthy relationships, and a job I wasn't happy with. While everyone was creating New Year's resolutions to lose weight, run a marathon, stop smoking, etc...I only had one New Year's resolution: To be positive. I made it my mission to live a life with a positive mental attitude and I have to say it's changed my life - completely. I've found that with a positive mental attitude, things happen, doors open, and most importantly life is brighter.

It's allowed me to weed out the unhealthy relationships. It's helped me overcome mental barriers. It's helped me become closer to friends. It's landed me my dream job. And most importantly, it's led me to a stronger relationship with myself.

I also realize this is a journey that is far from over but a journey I will continue to pursue.

So, my word for 2011: FORWARD

I have to remember that the progress I have accomplished so far this doesn't mean I can and should stop - I have to keep moving forward in all areas of life.